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The dating scene is fraught with hazards, but none, perhaps, are as intimidating as the first date. There's the dread of embarrassing yourself, the worry that perhaps the conversation will dry up ? and, of course, the ever-present possibility that this, at last, could turn out to be 'the one'. It's certainly enough to set even the most experienced dater's heart racing ? but if you have a first date looming on the horizon then don't go dropping the Rescue Remedy just yet. There are a number of ways to ensure that the experience goes without a cringe. Start by developing an action plan. Spontaneity is all very well in its place, but when it comes to first dates it's best to choose an activity that you know you both enjoy. Perhaps the two of you share on interest in art house film, or maybe you could bond over an off-the-wall waterskiing experience? The proviso is that you should be sure to let your date know about your plans - surprises should be kept until you know the person better. If you are your date lack common ground, then meeting over a coffee is a safe bet. However, make sure that you set a time limit. After all, there's only so long you can prolong an awkward conversation over a cup of coffee. Make it clear that you only have one or two hours to spare ? and then, if all goes well, you can always opt out of your 'previous arrangement'. Once the time and place for the date is set, it's time to think about first impressions. Make sure you're punctual, and always dress appropriately for the occasion. If you're feeling shy then the best tactic is to exude fake confidence ? he certainly won't be able to tell the difference, and you might even find that you trick yourself as well. Of course, the best way to radiate confidence is to charm your date with scintillating conversation. Not a great conversationalist? In that case, spend a little time beforehand thinking about the subjects you might want to discuss. Common ground, such as people you both know, places you have been and hobbies you both enjoy, is a good place to start. Even if you and your date are getting on like a house on fire, it's worth avoiding controversial conversation topics at first, unless of course your date initiates the topic himself. At the end of the day, remember that dating is really all about having fun. Playing by the rules can help avoid awkward moments, but ultimately you should feel free to be spontaneous. Relax, let your personality shine through, and there's no reason why your date shouldn't be an unqualified success.
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Robt Poorte is the author of this article. If you are looking for dating.guardian.co.uk/s/c/18424/Manchester">Manchester dating, or you are looking for lesbian or gay dating the Guardian Soulmates website provide a safe, secure and anonymous way to find and communicate.
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